Help! I’m Caught in a Country Song & Can’t Get Out!

It’s true – I am caught in a country song
and I cannot get out – cannot escape,
cannot get away – and the refrain, the
chorus, is not of my own making –
what’s a poor town girl with more
blue grass than red neck in her veins,
to do?

You can always count on a good country
song to have a tragedy – it’s kind of a rule –
there must be tears jerked out of your
eyes for it to be a really good country
song, after all – don’t know who made
the rule, but for sure, I know it is a rule.

I can resonate, my feet can tap, my soul
can dance, to the rhythms of my people’s
dulcimer-strummed truths accompanied
by nasal twang and throat-low lament
worn, always worn, with a sly side-smile,
shy, quiet, insistent, in its urgings

But there are no trucks in my back yard
no girl-boy gone bad moments to trace
into my present and no semis of any
sort rolling down my highways –
and I retired my own mall hair a very
very long time ago – I hated the 80's –
and I am not a country gal – love them,
come from them, but am not them –

so what happened that I am ensnared
so why am I caught with the drama
how, oh how, do I find my way out
of this country song of a life I did
not write and do not know the words to?

I much prefer the joy and abandon
of rock and roll, the soul-touching
sweetness of classical, and if there
need be soul-wrenching, give me
blue grass!

I do not want the bawdy, howling
soap-opera dramatizing country
song – it is not my life – but
somehow it is – and hear me well --
I am too old for this!  And so are you

There’s the tell – whenever there’s a
you in the story, well, there’s country

[sigh]

Ramp up the guitars, boys, here I come
and I have a story to tell
get out your hankies, ladies
it’s gonna be a tear-jerker
and it goes something like this

[cue YouTube Cowboy Music - Instrumental]

Liar
That’s right
You heard me
Liar
I say it again: 
liar
for if you 
did not care
what I think 
or what you
think I think, 
why are you
telling me 
how wrong it is?
I wonder what it’s like – 
that
conversation you’re having
all by yourself 
you call
talking to me?
Liar

[plug in your own
rhapsody of sorrow
here – sing and repeat]

Liar
That’s right
you heard me . . . 

[fade to black]