The Crosses We Carry

In the Gospel of Mark, Jesus says, “Take up your cross and follow me.”
He doesn’t say, “Take up my cross”; rather he says, “take up your cross.”
The fact is we all have crosses to bear – hard things about our lives, our circumstances.  Some of our crosses are just our own bad habits – the things we do that we know are wrong but just can’t seem to shake.
Some of our crosses are other people or situations that make our lives harder.
Some of our crosses are a heart for the pain and suffering of others.
Some of our crosses are just life . . . the aching bones of old age . . . the frustration of being young and having everyone telling you what to do all the time.
Whatever our crosses are, they are ours.
Most of us have crosses we carry or wear, symbols of our faith, but also reminders – of the ones who gave them to us, of times past, place and people memories we carry with us as surely as we do the crosses we wear.  And if we have more than one, usually there’s that special one – the cross we just can’t let go of.
What does your special cross mean to you?  Who or what do you think of when you see it?  Who gave it to you?
I have lots of crosses to choose from, a side effect of being a pastor, for whom the cross is often the default gift of choice.
But the one that draws me today was given to me by my friend Wes on the occasion when his wife Pam joined the church.
The cross has a chain of white abalone beads and comes from Bethlehem.
I treasure the irony of this cross that could travel so freely in a way the people of Bethlehem cannot.
And I treasure the friendship and kindness of a husband who would honor the day his wife joined the church with such a lovely gesture.
But most of all, when I wear or hold this cross, I think of Pam.
It is my cross to bear:  the cross of friendship lost.  Pam died two years ago this month, just a year the same month after she joined the church, having hesitated for many months, afraid she wouldn’t be able to contribute because of the cancer that was ravaging her body even then.
But this cross is also the reminder of how very much Pam and so many others have meant to my life and how grateful I am, even with the sorrow, to have been a part of their lives, if only for a little while.
That’s my cross to carry today.  What’s yours?